The prompt for this month’s #wordsmatter blog hop is “twenty years ago I”. This blog hop is hosted by Corinne, Parul and Shalini, Here is my story, part fact, part fiction.
The Freedom to Be
She looked at herself in the mirror and smiled. Yes, she looked perfect to go on stage and receive her award. “You’ve come a long way baby!” she said to herself. Who would have thought all those years ago that she would ever be considered as one of the most inspiring women even if was by just the local women’s organisation?
Twenty years ago
She went back in time, twenty years ago, when she had stood before another mirror and tried to cover the bruises on her face. No matter what she tried to do, the bruises refused to be hidden. It was as if they were talking to her and telling her that enough was enough.
They seemed to mock her and say, “Will hiding us change anything? In the night when you take off the makeup, the truth will stare you in the face once again. How long are you going to live like this? And why do you even want to?”
“Do you hate yourself so much that you will bear this abuse without a word? What great crime have you committed? And what are you teaching your children? That it is okay to put up with abuse? Tomorrow if they are in the same situation as you, will you want them to do what you are doing?”
She shuddered at the thought of her little angels ever having to go through this. Then why was she accepting it as her lot? Why was she so scared of taking any step to change things? Where was her confidence? Had she finally started to believe him when he told her that she was useless and stupid?
A flicker of rebellion
From somewhere deep down, a tiny flicker of rebellion rose, gathering force as she allowed it to live. She sat there on the bed and started planning. Suddenly she felt calm. Just the fact that she was willing to think about taking a stand, gave her a measure of control.
It was not going to be easy. She had no idea of what life would be like if she walked out; but walking out was a must. She knew she would have to lie and pretend to go with whatever he wanted for a while. Till now she was used to wearing a mask for the outside world, now she would wear one at home and bid her time.
Then and now
That was twenty years ago, when she had walked out with her seven year old daughters, scared and nervous. Today, she was a different person. She was a success in her own right and was living the kind of life she knew she deserved. Wonderful kids, wonderful friends and a career in writing that she loved. Her day was her own. Her life was her own. There was no one to tell her that she could not do what she wanted and she loved the freedom. The freedom to be herself!
I received this tag from Geethica at https://thoughtsbygeethica.com/ It’s my pleasure to pass on this tag to Rajlakshmi at https://www.pixelatedtales.com/ . There are 29 of us on this Blog Hop and it will be spread over 3 days – 1st, 2nd and 3rd November 2019. Do follow the #WordsMatter Blog Hop and prepare to be surprised!
This was a beautiful story of strength and hope. Women need to stand up for themselves and your story does exactly that. Good one, Sunita!
It takes so much courage to walk away from something like this! I’m glad you wrote such an empowering piece.
I needed to write it.
We women are never in a relationship with ourselves which is why we put up with the abuse and humiliation in a marriage. I remember when I wanted to divorce my then Husband, my mother counselled me saying whatever his faults, atleast he doesnt hit you!! I was in shock at this and wondered how my mother could e so much in denial over my unhappy state. But this is the truth in our lives and I say more power to every woman who has the guts to end such a dead end relationship and live life on her own terms.
Society seems to think that marriage is the solution to unhappiness, ignoring the fact that is can be the cause of so much unhappiness. I am glad you put your happiness first
Perhaps the best decision. No one should go through abuse of any kind. I guess making up the decision is the toughest part in our society where people judge you all the time for your choices
People always think that they know what is best for you. No one bothers to know the truth
More power to her to have moved forward. It is very important for anyone to not be a punching bag to someone. Not only we loose the self respect but also we become weak emotionally over time.
True. You actually start doubting yourself and wonder if you deserve the abuse.
I know of a woman who did this..later on she became one of prominent feminist scholar and activist. Today she runs an organisation for women who are facing domestic abuse. Women should have the courage to walk out but most just stay back for the sake of kids, family and ‘log kya kahenge?”
Sometimes it is better for the kids to move out rather than live in the terror of not knowing when things will flare up at home
I agree.
Getting out of a situation that ruins one’s peace of mind and leaves them battered and bruised is not something that comes easily to many. But those who do get out of it all find the happiness and the peace that eluded them for a long time!
There is a time when push comes to shove, and you have to act. But unfortunately many ignore that and end up battered mentally, emotionally as well as physically
That’s a wonderful message. It isn’t easy to step out in the unknown. Women often tend to put up with a lot of abuse only because they don’t think they are capable of supporting themselves or their children.
True. And that is what we are brought up to think. That we need a man’s protection. Even though the truth is we may need protection from the man
That hard earned freedom is precious. Great narration.
Thank you!
Sometimes we just need time to bring out our innate courage. I’m glad she got up and left.
Yes, sometimes we just need to find the courage, which is so elusive
No one should suffer like that! But yes, it takes a lot of courage to leave and walk into so much uncertainty. I am glad she proved her might. Good one.
Unfortunately a lot of women and even men suffer at the hands of their spouses. And they never find the courage to leave
Takes this kind of strength to change the cpurse of life. Love the message.
It hard to stop believing the lies, harder still to walk away and make a new life. I’m glad she did!
Very hard. And once you leave too, it’s not easy.
lovely take on the prompt. I am so glad that she took a decision of walking away from the abuser. It makes so much sense and none the less a lot more courage.
Thank you. Yes, it takes a lot of courage.
That takes strength and courage – not only to walk out on an abuser, but to say no to the “abuser” that lives within.
Sometimes it is more difficult recognising the abuser within.
I would guess “always.”
Walking away is hard but staying back and suffering is harder.Glad that she chose the path which gave her the freedom to be herself!!
I am glad she chose it too!