Have You Finished Your Homework?

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Over  the last few days, there have been a lot of messages on social media regarding kids who are missing. Most of them have thankfully been found again, but the trend is scary, because a lot of these kids have run away from home or school.

The comments on the social media groups regarding this have been varied, from relief that the children have been found, to blaming the children for not being able to deal with failure and running away in the face of obstacles.

For God’s sake! They are just kids! How many of us as adults are able to deal with failure or pressure? We have this convenient fall back of “Oh I’m so depressed” or “I have so much of stress!”  But what does a child say? What would you say to a child who told you that he or she was under a lot of stress or in a state of depression? Most adults would just scoff at the idea. “Really? At your age? What do you know about stress or depression?”

But look at the lives they live today. Even top executives have shorter work days.  I asked a few students what their schedule was. They are in school from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m. That is seven hours in school. Add to that the hours spent on homework and tuition classes and projects.  That is like 10 to 12 hours a day!

And what do they get at the end of it? Just questions and nagging from parents?

Let’s consider two sentences. “I love you!”  and “Have you finished your homework/portion?”

Which of these have you used more in the last few months /years while talking to your child?

Every single parent I spoke to ruefully admitted that they rarely told their kids how much they loved them or how important they were, while almost everyday there was an arguement about homework and studies.

I agree that we all want our kids to be successful in life. But where is it written that only getting high grades ensures success? What will make your child successful is something that is never taught in school. And that is the belief in himself or herself. That is something only you as a parent can build.

It involves time and effort. It involves communicating with your child. It involves going against social trends. This can happen only when we as parents change our mindset and stop looking at our kids as trophy kids whose achievements reflect back on us.

We need to accept our kids as they are, average grades and all. Then and only then are we laying the true foundations of their success.

A golden dragon, that’s who I’d be.

dragon-238931_1280One of the prompts on this week’s Friday Reflections was “ If you were an animal what would you be and why?”  Writing in response to this prompt makes me feel like a student in one of my creative writing classes. How often have I asked them to write on this topic, but never have I attempted to do so.  Ah well, there is a first time for everything and so here goes!

If I had to choose to be any animal in the world, I would choose to be a dragon; a beautiful golden dragon!

The reason I’d be a dragon is because I was born in the year of the dragon, but even before I knew that fact, dragons fascinated me. I never saw them as horrible evil creatures meant to be slain. To me, they were magical creatures who had tremendous power. They were the wisest of all beasts and the most regal. In fact the true king of the beasts would be the dragon not the lion.

And why a golden dragon? Because it is the most intelligent and pure of all dragons.  They are magical and can change their form at will. Though they are immensely strong, they prefer talking things over rather than using force. Their mission is to end evil and that is something I rather fantasize doing.

Whenever I imagine a golden dragon, I see a creature of great strength yet with such grace of movement that it is beauty in motion. Combine it with a mind of rare intelligence and what more could you want to be?

I imagine myself soaring across the moon, and swooping back down in a breathtaking dive. I imagine changing forms to tackle evil and making the earth a better place.  Oh what fun I would have belching out fire at corrupt politicians, paedophile priests and other such scum of the earth! I would be magical and good and powerful!  What other reason is needed to be a golden dragon?

What animal would you choose to be? Do leave your answer in the comments. I would love to know!

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You may also like to read my other blog post https://thequillofthephoenix.wordpress.com/2016/10/18/book-review-fighting-for-tara-by-sunanda-chatterjee/

Movie Review: Ae Dil Hai Mushkil

 

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Yesterday I watched Ae Dil Hai Mushkil and you know what? I enjoyed it.  No, I ‘m not going to be all trendy and bash the movie and Karan Johar, because I really, truly enjoyed it.

The thing is, I don’t go for a movie with any other expectation other than to relax, except if I consciously decide to watch a movie like “Pink”.

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I loved the songs and the craziness! Ranbir’s character Aayan loves to cuddle all the time. So what? There are teddy bear guys like that in real life and you would be so lucky to have someone like that in your life.

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Anushka Sharma’s character shoots her mouth off. Maybe we are not yet ready for a girl making fun of the way a guy kisses, but I loved the way she acts so care a damn honest.

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Ash looks Hot! And all of you who want to say, “Oh but she has Mickey Contactor to get her in shape!”, truth is she has got back into shape and is looking even more gorgeous than ever. There is a maturity about her that wasn’t there before.

And as for the falling in and out of love or lust at the drop of a hat, what’s wrong with that? We accept it in “Friends” and “Sex in the City” and other such firang stuff, so why not here?  And don’t give me that “oh but we are Indians”, bullshit. Or is it that we’d rather accept rape in out moves than consensual sex? I think it’s time we grew up.

Coming to the unrequited love part, well, life doesn’t always come with happy endings. So that’s fine. If hearts didn’t break, there’d be no stories.

The only jarring note really, was the ending. It looks like the plot ran way by itself and they didn’t know how to tie the bow. It should have been left untied. Ideally the movie should have ended when Fawad and Ranbir meet again accidentally in London. But I suppose we are not yet ready for untied bows either.

 

21 random facts about me

11351327_1003802446304578_2977861388820677101_nThis post is written in response to a prompt on Friday Reflections on  Write Tribe

 

I thought I’d choose this topic for Friday reflections and just finish it in a jiffy. After all it is just 21 random facts about yourself right? How hard is that to write? But as I started writing, I realised that while I could find enough facts to pen down, how many did I really want to share with the world? And so I guess that becomes my first fact. And since it does say random, forgive me if I jump from one area of my life to the other and back with no link or connection what so ever.

  1. I don’t like to share my innermost feelings or thoughts with any one. There is always that one wall behind which I hide.
  2. I have twin daughters. I would have loved to have a couple more but was too mindful of the ever growing population of the world.
  3. I talk to all animals, even the spiders and lizards in my house. I even name them!
  4. The only animals I kill are mosquitoes.
  5. I can spend the whole day in bed with a good book and then wonder how it has suddenly become dark.
  6. I love to be alone at home. If I could, I’d never leave the house. And that scares me so much that I force myself to get out.
  7. I hate to cook dal chaval. But I love to bake.
  8. Old Bollywood songs over modern music any day.
  9. A jar of Nutella lasts for one sitting. So I get a separate jar for my daughter and we label our respective jars.
  10. I have trained myself to go alone for movies, or for a beer and a meal. And I feel great about it!
  11. When I was young, Dad used to take me with him to watch English war movies and action thrillers since mom hated going to the theatre. I still prefer those movies over romance or comedy.
  12. I fell in love at the age of 11, with Rishi Kapoor when I went to see Bobby.
  13. I still read Enid Blyton books. Though I also read Nora Robert and Jim Butcher. (I love the Dresden Files)Book-Cover-1
  14. My first book, “Who Shall I be today?” was published this year in March. It is a book of poems and got some pretty good reviews.
  15. I have a huge pink Teddy bear named Fred whom I bought as a birthday gift for myself on my 50th birthday.
  16. I eat ice cream as I walk down the road.
  17. I hate wearing formal clothes though I envy the people who can carry them off.
  18. I love dancing and I just need to hear the music to get itchy feet.
  19. I prefer Prof. Bhaer over Mr. Darcy. But if I had to describe the kind of man I am still waiting for, he would have to be able to dance, feed me awesome food and love to read.IMG-20140706-WA0002
  20. The reason I get out of bed nowadays, is my crazy dog, Muffin. She came into my life two years ago, as a puppy who needed to be rescued from the gutter she had fallen in. Today, I can’t imagine a life without her.
  21. I am writing my first novel. And I just hope I don’t tire of it half way through!

So , I guess that’s it. What about you? What would you like to share about yourself?

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